It doesn’t matter if you are here in Oak Creek, Wisconsin, or anywhere else across the country—kids are losing confidence faster than ever before. As a martial arts instructor who has been teaching across five different decades since the 1980s, I’ve seen the shift firsthand.
If you feel like your child’s self-esteem is struggling, it’s likely due to two major factors that are robbing them of their natural ability to develop “grit.”
1. The Dopamine Trap of Instant Gratification
Think back to the original Super Mario Brothers. You hit that first question mark brick, and—boom—you get a mushroom. You get big. You get superpowers. It’s instant reward. Today’s video games and tablets have taken that instant dopamine hit and put it on steroids.
When kids are constantly rewarded for doing almost nothing, they don’t learn how to work for a result. They don’t learn how to “grind” through a challenge. Without the grind, there is no development of grit—and without grit, there is no real, lasting confidence.
2. The Participation Award Culture
We need to talk about participation trophies. Back in the early 2000s, there was a massive push to ensure everyone got a medal to “build up confidence.” Fast forward twenty years, and we can see where that has gotten us.
Rewarding a child just for showing up creates a false sense of confidence. Real confidence isn’t given; it’s earned. When we give out awards without the effort, we rob our kids of the chance to overcome an obstacle. We are teaching them that they don’t have to push themselves to succeed, which leaves them totally unprepared for the “bumps and bruises” of the real world.
The Science of Success: It’s All About Grit
If you go to Google and search for the TED Talk on Grit (by Angela Duckworth), you’ll see that researchers looked at every demographic—income, education, and IQ. They found that the greatest predictor of success as an adult wasn’t how smart someone was or how much money their parents made.
It was Grit.
Grit is the “unquantifiable” drive to keep going when things get hard. It’s the indomitable spirit that allows someone to push through failure and come out stronger on the other side.
How We Build Grit in Oak Creek
At Championship Martial Arts – Oak Creek, we don’t believe in a participation-trophy world. We believe in a world where kids are encouraged to work hard and earn their progress.
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The Grind: Our Oak Creek Kids Martial Arts Page focuses on setting real goals. When a student earns a new belt, they know it’s because they put in the work—not because they just showed up.
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The Three Pillars: Every class is built on Learning, Laughing, and Sweating. We want kids to have fun, but we also want them to push their physical and mental limits.
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Confidence Through Competence: By learning how to protect themselves in our Preschool and Youth programs, kids develop a quiet, real confidence that doesn’t rely on a trophy.
Find a Location Near You
If you want your child to develop the grit they need to succeed as adults, come visit us. We have three main locations serving Southeast Wisconsin:
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Oak Creek: Championship Martial Arts – Oak Creek
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Kenosha: Championship Martial Arts – Kenosha
Affiliate Locations: